Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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