am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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