i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Randomize
