Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Randomize