everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
