i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
