if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
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