HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
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