they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
