I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
