Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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