Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
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