i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
