Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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