ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
