i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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