I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Randomize