Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
