my mouth tastes like poor choices
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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