I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
