I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Randomize
