After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize