I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
