There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
