that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
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