I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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