Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize