i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
