The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
that may or may not have been my penis.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
