dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
