we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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