The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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