At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
