I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
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