i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Randomize
