So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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