"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
