If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
