Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
