Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
