I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize