This girl is more easily done than said...
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
