so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
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