you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
