Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
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