You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
