I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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