How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
