3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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