what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
